Archive for the ‘Current Affairs’ Category

Happy Birthday My Love

Today is one of those days…I have nothing to give my bride for her special day. Well at least nothing that costs money. Over the past several years, I have not been able to give her a cool gift on her birthday. I guess the good news is she is happy to just have me, my heart and my affection.

Is she disappointed by not getting a super cool gift or expensive jewelry? Maybe, but she loves me for just being me and doesn’t act disappointed or let down. This year, all I could give her was a cheap date that consisted of dessert and coffee. We had big plans for dinner and a movie but those plans got messed up by circumstances outside our control so we did dessert and coffee instead. She rolled with it and we had fun anyway. It was the first date we have had for many weeks so it was kind of a big deal!

Dear Jenni,

I am so thankful for the woman you have become. You give so much to so many people everyday of your life. You take care of your boys in so many amazing ways. You do mounds of laundry every week even though you have tons of other work to do. You make us amazing meals that are creative and healthy. You show love to our boys even when they are disobedient and grumpy. You are patient with me when I am detached and stressed.

Please accept this post as a token of how much you are loved and appreciated. I hope one day your body doesn’t hurt and you can sleep all night and feel rested for a day. Maybe I won’t have to work so hard to massage all the kinks out of your neck that day!

I am seriously thankful to have you as a partner on this crazy journey of life. It’s awesome that we get to be a part of changing lives and advancing God’s Kingdom together. One day, I will get you a super cool birthday present and blow your mind! Until then, you just get me.



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So I feel very convicted from my time with God this morning. He is asking me to share what I am learning with the people around me that are ready to learn…Some of you are probably way more knowledgeable than me in these topics, others may have no interest at all. This is for the people who are interested but maybe not sure where to start.

Let me give you a little background on why I speak with confidence on these topics. From 1999 to 2007 I worked in the residential mortgage business in Portland, OR and dabbled in real estate investing. From 2007-2010 I was a licensed financial advisor and went through a lot of product training. Over the past two years I have invested a lot of time in reading and studying economics and the issues that are effecting all of our personal finances. Most importantly I have done a lot of praying and seeking God’s wisdom in these areas.

Jenni and I  have systematically reduced our monthly expenses from a high of around $7500 per month a few years ago down to around $3500 today. We believe in living a simple life with an emphasis on investing in people and ministry. We believe that we have been adopted into the Kingdom of Heaven. Being children of the Kingdom we are blessed with unlimited resources when we follow His instructions for living and claim His promises in faith. (this is a whole other post or 10).

Today I want to focus on a few points that can be found in the parable of the talents Matthew 25:14-30 NKJV. Come on a short journey with me.

  • Those who have spent time seeking wisdom will be given more to manage. there is real truth to this, we are instructed to seek wisdom and understanding in regards to growing and protecting our resources. We need to be excellent stewards and treat what God has given us with the utmost care.
  • We should not hoard what God has entrusted to us. Money needs to flow to grow.
  • The treasures of the Kingdom are entrusted to His servants. Look closely at verse 14 where it specifically talks about who was given the talents to manage.
  • He trusts us to do our research and to make decisions with the wisdom He is imparting to us. Seek Him, do your research, seek wise council, be decisive and pay attention. (After the talents were distributed He went on a journey verse 15). We may not hear a clear yes or no on every financial decision that we face.
  • We should not paralyzed by be fear and indecision. (This is a tough one for me because I am not decisive naturally and from childhood I learned to live in fear). Look at verse 25 because I think this speaks to most of us. Once we have done our due diligence we need to take action.

Please meditate on this parable and pray for wisdom to be revealed to you. It is extremely important to draw out what God has to say to you personally. My only objective is to get you to start thinking and asking questions so you can act wisely and decisively.

Interested in some fabulous resources? Contact me by email, Facebook or twitter and I will be happy to share them.

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I realize that my last post left a lot of detail out so I decided to make it a 2 part series…

In my attempt to be open and real I don’t want to point blame anywhere but on myself. The fact is Jenni and I grew up in such different environments that we developed habits and responses to things that are totally different and not always complimentary. I want to express that I am really sorry for my lack of emotion and expression in so many years of our marriage.

Jenni grew up around constant conflict and I grew up with passivism (I made that word up) and conflict avoidance. When I was rude or unthoughtful Jenni would quickly let me know. When Jenni would get upset with me sometimes she spoke to me in an abrasive tone. This was how she learned to cope in her home growing up. I, however learned to shut everyone out when things were uncomfortable. I never really saw open conflict in my home so I didn’t really know how to respond to it in marriage. I would respond by shutting down and avoiding her and our issues. Jenni did not have any ill intent in her communication with me, but I perceived it as an attack and would totally retreat. Over the years I harbored these feelings of bitterness but never talked about it.

Jenni became very aware of how she communicated with me. She really worked hard at not letting things bug her so much and to bring them up to me in gentler way. She has also really become an incredible supporter of me, very selfless in so many ways. She is an incredible mother to our children and an extremely devoted wife to me.

Over the years I was pretty lazy about working on my issues and being able to communicate my feelings to her. So I didn’t really progress, I just tried to do all the right actions when it came to serving Jenni or our kids. Actions with out the intimate interaction is pretty useless. It’s like “truth and law” with out “love and grace”.

The more Jenni understood of herself, the better she got at being a safe place for me. In the last year I finally started to let her in to my inner world. I am still pretty guarded at times but it is something I am aware of and working on. The great thing now is that I trust Jenni with my feelings but I still have to dig down and uncover what I’m feeling.

With every level of new awareness we have a greater obligation to work on ourselves in order to be better as a couple. My only reason for sharing these thoughts is encourage someone else who may be experiencing similar challenges in their life. If one person can find some healing then it’s all worth while.

I would love to hear your thoughts.

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This week-end we headed out to Lincoln City with the family. It’s always hard to get away but thankfully Jenni does a good job of scheduling these things for us every quarter or so. She is so great too because she packs up our whole family while I’m at work. I get home and we hit the road right away. It’s quite awesome!

This week-end started out rough but ended great. Jenni and I had friction on the way out-of-town and didn’t really talk about it until Saturday. I broke down after a tiff regarding the children. I was holding back and not talking about feelings I had experienced. Any of you guys ever do that? Ha Ha…Don’t even tell me you haven’t.

Basically I am still experiencing some bitterness from the way Jenni interacted with me during our early years of marriage. There is still junk in my emotional life that I need to deal with and things I need to process and forgive Jenni for. It is strange because I already forgave her for something that seems so much bigger and uglier.

Here is the deal: Even tiny bits of bitterness left unchecked can destroy you! The issues I need to forgive are being controlling, speaking harshly to me, being selfish and so on. These were things that happened over time and I never spoke up to let her know how it affected me. I just tried to deal with it silently, alone. Now, 6-8 years later I am still feeling the effects and trying to continue dealing with it alone. If your saying, “why would you do that?” I don’t really have an answer.

I at least told her what I am feeling so now we can process it together and she can make adjustments to help me heal and forgive. It’s my job to let her in and share these feelings when they show up. Satan wants me to suffer silently and be bitter, God desires me to be whole and for our relationship to thrive.

What do you need to bring out in the open? Walk with me and find forgiveness for the one you feel bitterness toward.

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It is so beautiful even with this “unbearable heat”!  Thank the Lord for my airconditioner right now.  (I am very sorry if you don’t have one and you live where it’s hot.)

Last week I started my education to be re-certified as a mortgage loan officer and I finished that on Tuesday evening.  Now I need to go take the test probably sometime next week.  I hope I can pass it, I didn’t do so well on some of the practice quizzes.  At this point, I don’t even know if it’s a good idea to try and do mortgages again.  If you know anyone ready to buy a house or needing a refinance, I should be in business again with in a week or two.

There is something about not working full time.  It’s great to have time with Jenni and playing with the boys but we can’t do much because we don’t have any money to spend.  That is the quandary of life; plenty of time but no money or plenty of money with no time.

Still looking at lots of work options so let me know of anything you hear about.  I am not qualified for too much but I learn quick and work hard.

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You have to watch this video no matter which way you lien politically.

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Getting Settled

Another move is complete!  Hopefully the last one for a looooooong time.  Just finished the last few items last night and now on to getting things hung on the wall and organized.  With a wife like mine things need to get organized quickly!  This is a good thing because it could be months to get it in order if left entirely up to me.

Now I just need to get back into routine with life and work and blogging.  I am hopeful that by next week I will be back into a rythm again.

Continued prayer for the Resnick family is needed as they grieve their great loss.  For me with my work situation.

Thanks for stopping by.

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I cannot believe how much time has flown by since I posted last.  A while back I committed to keeping my blog up to date, well I have failed at that big time.

Life is crazy in the Clayville house these days.  Jenni and I have been through a lot in the last month and it just keeps coming.  The latest tragedy that we  recently  experienced can be seen on Jenni’s site so I will let you read about it there.

We are moving this week end and just starting to pack.  I am looking for a full time job and considering buying a franchise.  Your prayers would be appreciated in regards to the right move for me.  Considering some Mortgage opportunities and applying for banking jobs in the financial services arena.

Chance and Paxton are both doing great.  Chance is talking up a storm every day and keeping us entertained with his new observations.  Paxton is starting to crawl and that means no more laying him down and not worrying about where he will end up.

After the move I will recommit to posting on a regular basis.

Today we celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary.  I am so in love with my wife!

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Time has really gotten the better of me and I have failed at keep my blog up to date.

Yesterday I received the modem for installing Clear the new wireless internet company.  It is pretty cool, it was up and running as fast as I could unwrap the cords and plug the modem into a power outlet.  It seems to be pretty fast, I haven’t run a speed test on it yet but will do that later.  We decided to get rid of Verizon Fios for TV, Internet and Telephone to save money.  Clear is $40 something a month and we can get a phone line from Skype for $3.00/month.  Television is just going to be non existent for the next 6 months to a year.

Tonight I begin to really work on prepping my talk for next Sunday’s church service.  Pastor Matt from Church@bethany asked me to fill in the week he is going to the Midwest for his high school reunion.  I have never preached to adults for a church service in my life so this is a little nerve wracking.  Maybe I should start preparing what I am going to speak on.  Definitely be praying for me on this one.

We got some pictures taken today by a friend, Sara Gray, who was in the high school program when Jenni and me were volunteer leaders at Sunset Presbyterian.  She is now graduated from college and building her photography career.  Here are a couple family shots she posted on Face Book.  She did a great job and was super quick which is crucial with toddlers.


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I am sitting here watching Dateline NBC "to catch a predator"

This is the saddest thing I can imagine.  Seeing all these guys show up to a set up and get arrested for planning to do something so perverse.  Satan has such a hold on so many men, they can’t even stop themselves.  My first thought is disgust by the intention of these guys when they show up for their rendezvous.  Then I think, wow these guys really need Jesus.  They are seeking some kind of gratification that will never be fulfilled by any perverse act.

Ted Roberts spoke about all these issues at the church summer conference.  Internet Porn is the starting point for most men to end up these situations.  I don’t even know what the solution is.  God help us.

On a more positive note:  I did get help purchasing the plane ticket to go to Wyoming.  I am leaving on the 4th of August and returning on the 9th.  It will be awesome to spend some time with my good friend.  We will probably spend time camping and fishing because it is a major outdoors man and I love that stuff too.

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